


The perks of having a villainous lover no one knows about

by Arvari



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Attempt at Humor, Established Relationship, Fluff, M/M, sort of
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-21
Updated: 2015-02-21
Packaged: 2018-03-14 09:08:34
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,337
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3405113
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Arvari/pseuds/Arvari
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>An evening after a battle. A (kind of) surprise visit. Some healing. Some cuddles. Nothing out of the ordinary. Until..</p>
            </blockquote>





	The perks of having a villainous lover no one knows about

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fanfiction (well, first in English). Please, be kind? =) All mistakes are mine, so if you see any, please let me know.

„Stark, what did we say about you unnecesarilly putting your life in danger?“  
„Oh, _fuck_!“  
Loki only raised an eyebrow when Tony Stark jumped from the couch, only to fall back down the next moment because of a sudden dizziness.  
„Stark.“  
„And what did we say about scaring the... living daylights out of me?!“ Tony said without even trying to open his eyes. The world was spinning around him. „What the hell are you doing here? Shouldn't you be licking your wounds somewhere? You know, like a proper villain?“  
Loki shrugged.  
„Well, I thought it would be much nicer to come here and lick _your_ wounds. Oh, the mighty hero who saved the city from a completely harmless Easter bunny.“  
„It was a _giant_ Easter bunny.“  
„And, I repeat, completely harmless,“ Loki smirked and sat on the couch next to Tony. „And you knew that. I know because I told you before the attack. But you just had to go and be Tony Stark, one of the Earth's mightiest heroes, and-“  
„I just really hate giant bunnies,“ Tony murmured.  
The next moment he was sitting on Loki's lap and almost purring when Loki raised an arm to run his long fingers through Tony's short hair.  
„So, how badly did you manage to hurt yourself?“  
„It's just a concussion and a few bruises. Which, by the way, means your rabbit wasn't as harmless as you think.“  
„Bunny.“  
„Yeah, whatever.“  
Tony's face was against Loki's shoulder, his hands caressing the god's sides, his eyes slowly closing. The headache was suddenly getting a lot better, the dizziness almost disappearing. He heard Loki murmuring some words in a language Tony didn't understand.  
„Are you healing me, Snowhite?“ he asked quietly.  
„You didn't think I would let you suffer, did you? Especially when it's all my fault.“  
„I never said it was _all_ your fault, Lokes. Most of it, yes, but-“  
„Anthony, do yourself a favour and shut up. Or not only will I let you suffer, but I will _make_ you suffer.“  
„No, you won't.“  
„Don't push your luck, Stark. And stop drooling on my shoulder, will you?“  
„Sleepy,“ Tony murmured.  
„Then sleep,“ Loki smiled and put his arms around Tony. „Oh, but shouldn't you be with the other Avengers? Don't you heroes usually have some sort of a party to celebrate your great victory?“  
„Maybe. But I am injured, remember? And resting. In fact, I think I should rest for at least a few days. No need to be jealous, Snowhite.“  
„How many times do I have to ask you to stop using that nickname?“  
„As many as you want. I won't stop.“  
Loki smelled Tony's hair and smiled.  
„So you will pretend you are still injured, so you can spend some time with me?“  
„Yeah. The perks of having a villainous lover no one knows about. I hope you don't have any plans to try taking over the world in the next few days.“  
„It's been really long since I've last tried to take over the world, love,“ Loki whispered. „How's your head?“  
„All better, thanks.“  
„No problem.“  
They sat quietly for a while, holding each other. Tony was only a few seconds from falling asleep (and Loki too, if he'd be honest), when there was a soft 'ding'.  Then the door of an elevator opened and Natasha walked in with a box of pizza in her hand. She stopped dead when she noticed the pair on the couch.  
„Oh, sorry,“ she said when Tony raised his head sharply. „I just wanted to check if you're alright and bring you some food. I didn't know your super secret boyfriend was here.“  
„Oh?“ Tony blinked. „Oh!“ he then exclaimed and looked at Loki as if he saw him for the first time ever. „Jarvis, we have an intruder!“  
„Sir, if I may,“ came Jarvis' voice. „I understand what you are trying to achieve, but I doubt your strategy is going to be successful.“  
„And why is that?“  
„Well, sir, first of all, you are still sitting on the supposed intruder's lap.“  
„He... He tricked me? Pretended to be a really hot chick?“ Tony tried.  
„Anthony? She called me your super secret boyfriend,“ said Loki.  
Tony frowned. „Did she?“  
„She did,“ Natasha confirmed.  
„Fuck.“ Tony tried, really tried to crack a perfect smile at her. „It won't help if I say it's not what it looks like, will it?“  
„No. Sorry.“  
„Okay. It's exactly what it looks like. Can I at least pack my bag before you drag me to Fury's office for fraternizing with the enemy?“  
„Stark, I blame it on the concussion, although I have no doubts Loki's taken care of it already,“ Natasha smirked. „I'd hate to think you really are such an idiot.“  
„What?“ Tony frowned.  
Natasha walked over to the couch and dropped the box right next to them.  
„Eat the pizza. We will talk in the morning. With both of you.“  
„What?!“ Tony repeated.  
„Your super secret boyfriend, Anthony,“ said Loki with a roll of his eyes. „I think you underestimated your teem a little, love. It seems I am not as much 'a villainous lover no one knows about' as 'a villainous lover _everybody_ knows about'.“  
Tony didn't see Natasha wink before entering the elevator. Loki did. And he couldn't help a little smile it put on his face.  
„Oh, hell,“ said Tony after another soft 'ding'. „Are you seriously telling me they've known all the time?“  
„Maybe not all the time,“ Loki shrugged. „Let's face it, we weren't exactly subtle sometimes. Like when you made me change into that tall, black-haired, green-eyed... _woman_ and go on a date with you.“  
„Did you just want to say 'bitch'?“  
„Definitely not.“  
Tony sighed. And then sighed again. He shook his head.  
„Damn it, they know,“ he murmured.  
„Yes, love, they do.“  
„What are we going to do?“  
„Eat the pizza. Go to sleep. And listen to whatever they have to say in the morning.“  
„Really? You will stay?“  
„Why wouldn't I? It was the plan.“  
„Well, yes, but what if you don't like _the Talk_ they're probably going to give us? What if they'll want you to give up your villainous lifestyle or something, if you want to be with me officially?“  
„We'll see, Anthony. We'll see.“  
Tony's eyes almost popped out of his head at that.  
„I'm sorry, what? Did you really just imply that you might consider-“  
„We'll see, love,“ Loki repeated. „But yes. I might.“  
There was a moment of silence. Then Tony raised an eyebrow.  
„You're running out of ideas, aren't you? The giant Easter bunny was pretty terrible, and you have no idea what to do next to make our lives more miserable. Am I right?“  
„Stark, let me tell you something,“ Loki smirked, opened the box of pizza and took a slice. „Right now, trying to take over the world suddenly seems like a _wonderful_ idea.“  
„Yeah,“ Tony nodded and took a bite from the pizza in Loki's hand. „I bet it does. Come on, Lokes. Come to the bright side. We have cookies. Well, maybe. We definitely had some a few days ago. Jarvis, do we have cookies?“  
„I believe we do, sir.“  
„See? Cookies,“ Tony grinned.  
„Oh, Anthony. My dear Anthony,“ Loki laughed and leaned in to kiss him. „Are cookies really all you have to offer?“  
„Well, you're already eating the pizza,“ Tony murmured into the kiss.  
„Idiot.“  
„You love me, Snowhite. You know you do.“  
„Yes. Yes, I do,“ Loki smiled. „And I must admit you are far more amusing than causing chaos has been lately. Maybe even more amusing than world domination.“  
„Glad to be of assistance. Does that mean you will give up your _villainous lifestyle_?“  
„Stark, have I ever told you you're an insufferable-“  
„Not today, love, no,“ Tony answered and took another bite of Loki's pizza.  
„I hate you,“ said Loki.  
„No, you don't.“  
„Alright, Stark. I will give up my 'villainous lifestyle'. For you. Satisfied?“  
„Not for the cookies?“  
„ _STARK!_ “

**Author's Note:**

> If you want, you can check out my (only a few days old, so not at all interesting) tumblr here: http://the-impossible-arvari.tumblr.com/


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